Sexy threesomes with another woman give me and my husband a buzz — but will they kill romance?

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DEAR DEIDRE: THREESOMES with another woman give me and my husband such a buzz. But it is causing rows, too.

These other woman is my hairdresser and we have become friends.

Getty – Contributor

Since the first time we all had sex, weve enjoyed regular threesomes[/caption]

She is 39 and very pretty. I am 41. My husband is 42 and we have been married for 18 years. We have a daughter aged 20 who lives with her boyfriend.

My friend’s last relationship broke up a year ago and she was feeling very down about it. I invited her to come out with me and my husband to cheer her up.

We had a good evening and a lot to drink. At the end of the evening she started crying.

She didn’t want to go back to her empty flat, so we invited her over to ours. I said we always kept the spare bed made up.

Getty – Contributor

I was shocked when my husband started kissing my friend – but I was also really turned on[/caption]

We chatted and had a few more drinks. Then my husband said her ex must be mad to finish with her and he gave her a hug.

Next thing I knew, they were kissing. I was shocked at first but realised I found it arousing. One thing led to another and we ended up in bed together, all three of us.

The sex was mind-blowing. Afterwards, my friend went to sleep in the spare room and none of us said anything about the next morning.

We arranged to go out for a drink again two weeks later. I think we all knew what would happen and we all wanted it.

Getty – Contributor

I sometimes get angry when my husband suggests another threesome, but I can’t deny I want it too[/caption]

It has since become a regular thing. We never talk about it when we are sober but when we are drunk we all find it very exciting. My husband and I have a good sex life but it is like she gives us an extra buzz.

We are not sure where to go with it, though. I get ratty if he suggests it and I think it’s too soon. I suppose I feel threatened, though I do like her and enjoy the threesomes when they happen.

Once we get drinking together, I don’t trust any of us to have any willpower.
Should we stop seeing her and drinking with her?

topic4today

ONE in five men suffers from loss of sex drive.

It’s far more common than it used to be but perhaps that’s not surprising when you remember stress and depression can lower libido.

But there is a lot they – and their partner – can do. My e-leaflet Reviving A Man’s Sex Drive explains.

For a copy email problems@deardeidre.org or private message me on my DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.


DEIDRE SAYS: It so often leads to hurt and misunderstanding between a couple to involve other people in your sex life.

But it seems a shame to cut your already lonely friend out of your lives altogether. Agree with your husband the threesomes must stop before your marriage is damaged further.

Plan your tactics with regards to your friend. Have a talk with her too and say the threesomes are going to have to stop before anyone is further hurt. My e-leaflet Thinking Of A Threesome could help.

If you don’t trust yourselves to go out all three of you for a drink, why don’t just you and her meet up?

You could go to the cinema, say, steering clear of alcohol.


READ TODAY’S DEAR DEIDRE I need to drink to ask a girl out – but when I drink I make a fool of myself

READ DEIDRE’S PHOTO CASEBOOK Anna doesn’t like the thought of Denny staying on her sofa


Get in touch with Deidre today

Got a problem? Send an email to problems@deardeidre.org. Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

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